“It was really scary at first. The first meeting I went to, I had to stand up and say, ‘I’m Zak Hardaker and I’m an alcoholic’.” Facing the mental health stigma as a rugby league player. It was at this moment where a journey of self-discovery began for one of the sport’s most highly decorated players in recent years.
From 2016 to 2017, Zak Hardaker experienced a myriad of mental health-related issues, including social media spats with fans, taking cocaine and being sacked as a player. After 12 months away from the game because of a drugs ban, the three-time Super League winner and former Man of Steel signed for Wigan Warriors in October 2018. Days later, he was arrested for drink-driving. Undergoing 26 days of rehabilitation with the Sporting Chance Clinic was Hardaker’s last life to save his rugby league career.
“I unloaded to a group of men. There are things I told that group that I’ve not told my girlfriend, my mum or anyone else. I wrote a diary about each day. I took thoughts out of my head and put them down on paper. From that period, that’s what changed me,” says 28-year-old Hardaker.
“I arrived at Wigan overweight. I then got done for drink-driving. I remember being in a police cell and falling asleep straight away. I woke up early and someone put a tray of porridge underneath the door. I sat up with my head in my hands and I was thinking to myself, ‘I’m definitely done now’.
”I didn't know myself as a human being.”
“I spoke to Wigan and they saw something was clearly not right with me, my life and my choices. There was an underlining problem. Wigan suggested I went to rehab – and at first, I said ‘no chance’. But to stay in rugby league I had to go.”
Sporting Chance is a charity that provides services in counselling, residential treatment and education training for current and ex-professional athletes. Describing his experience at an addiction and recovery facility in Hampshire, the ex-Leeds Rhinos and Castleford Tigers man admitted that the support he received allowed him to start afresh and rediscover himself.
“There were three other lads from different sports, and we were all there for different reasons. I was there for alcohol reasons as every time I’ve been in trouble it had involved alcohol.
“We each had a booklet and answered questions inside. You would write down the answer and you would cry – a tear would hit the paper whilst you were writing. By the end of the four weeks, I had got all my thoughts and feelings off my chest and I was then advised to put the book in a shredder, which I did. All those bad memories had gone. It was a strange time, but I enjoyed it. I know myself now. Mentally, I’m really well tuned.”
Eight four-bed residential programmes are delivered every year at Sporting Chance and the charity says that, approximately, five of the elite athletes who use the residential clinic are rugby league players.
Head of Clinical Services, Craig Dexter, 46, explained: “A player may be sent to us because of mental health-related symptoms surrounding addiction, anxiety or depression. It’s about managing their emotions and self-care by introducing mechanisms to enable them to get out of their inappropriate coping strategies like drugs or alcohol. It’s all part of the process for the player to be able to step back on the pitch and continue their career.”
Not only increasing his understanding of mental health and his confidence in talking about his issues, Hardaker’s recovery has allowed him to thrive on the rugby league pitch again. His comeback season with Wigan in 2019 saw him take a clean sweep of awards, including the club’s Player of the Year. The full-back also represented Great Britain Lions on the tour of New Zealand and Papua New Guinea at the end of the year.
He said: “I’ve been through a lot of heartache. I’m 28 and I feel like I’ve lived a 45-year-old life. My mental health has been really bad, and I’ve had experiences that have really tested me as a human being, never mind a rugby league player. Talking has made a massive impact for me. It takes a weight off your shoulders. You go into work a lot happier, you train better and your performances improve.
Credit: Wigan TV
“I got diagnosed with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) in 2016 and it helped me to realise there is something not quite right with me. It’s only in the last four years where I’ve got to grips to realise what mental health is.”
Meanwhile, with over 100 rugby league players accessing counselling services every year at Sporting Chance, and 1,200 one-to-ones taking place since 2012 at Rugby League Cares, there is a strong demand for provisions to be provided to rugby league professionals.
RL Cares is the sport’s independent welfare charity that provides core funding for Sporting Chance so that counselling and mental health support is available to all current players. Former Wigan Player Welfare Manager and now RL Cares Welfare and Development Manager, Steve McCormack, 47, believes the improvements of resources open to rugby league players in the last decade has seen a transformation in the mental health ‘stigma’ within the sport.
The ex-Salford City Reds, Widnes Vikings and Scotland Head Coach said: “My role is to touch base with as many players as I can – generally to check in on them every month. I’ve sat down with nearly 200 players in the last 12 months.
“We’re changing the stigma where players are reluctant to ask for help. RL Cares started in 2010 and the thing I’ve noticed over that period of time is that people want to talk a lot more. In 2010, the tragic suicide death of Great Britain hooker Terry Newton – a friend of mine – made a lot of people in the game look up.
“Terry’s left a legacy that we need to speak more. It’s a legacy that no one wanted to happen, but the sport has changed since then. All sports are working hard with their welfare policies, but I’m proud of what rugby league does.”
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